(panoramic iphone pic. makes my studio look huge, ha)
It happened yesterday. you know those days where you're dragging ass and distracting yourself as much as you can from working in the studio? yup. its funny how things go in cycles and when they come around again its as if it were a whole new discovery. hallelujer! ya well, yesterday was one of those days where at the end of the day in the studio i was talking with my girlfriend and she graciously (as is her demeanor) points out to me this cycle and what i'm doing. i have this tendency to talk about my work as if its already in the state i wish it would be. meaning, i have these ideas of where i want to take the work but haven't gotten there,...yet.
just by asking me to look at the work and really see what i'm doing that's pushing boundaries where i would like to see the work go is humbling. its humbling because i already know this. its not that i want to reinvent anything or radically change my work to painting still life's of nothing but tubes of toothpaste. it's more so merging elements that are both known and made up while creating exciting worlds. granted, if i were already achieving everything now it would get boring and unchallenging. i mean, that's the whole point right? to grow, discover, enjoy the journey, kick and scream, etc.
i have found so far that this business of painting full time can be tricky. it can easily turn into work with meeting demands of upcoming group shows, commissions, trying to build inventory, etc. the scary part is balancing the love and time needed to explore and create new work and worrying about income. if you worry too much about just the money part of things your work will suffer and so will your ganas, but you need to produce work. i by no means am at the point where my name is that known, but i am at
the point to where things are picking up a bit so i can see those potentials.
i guess what i'm blabbing about is that despite meeting demands and so forth there needs to be time taken to cultivate your craft, thoughts, experiments, questions, and new ideas for growth. all of that time spent is just as, if not more relevant, than making finished paintings. maybe this all sounds better in my head. nonetheless, ITS OK and necessary to take time to do studies and the like rather than just churn out paintings and burning out.